A Buccaneers Christmas Special

Merry Christmas, everyone! Hope all of our readers are enjoying the time with family and friends today as we kick back and enjoy all the festivities that the day brings.

Now, I know all of our audience does not celebrate Christmas, so for those that don’t, I hope all of you are having a wonderful holiday season no matter what it is that you and your loved ones choose to celebrate. This is the season where - by and large - it doesn’t matter if you celebrate Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanza, Festivus, any of it - it tends to bring out the best in people. People are a little more gracious, a little more kind, a little more understanding. That’s what this time of year is truly about.

But I’m not here to write a dissertation on the trends of the season. No no. I’m here to rewrite classic songs into Buccaneers anthems. Let’s get started, shall we?

Deck The Halls (Of One Buc Place)

Jameis cut back on those picks, please

Fa la la la la, la la la la (fa la la la la, la la la la)

Protect the ball and we’d win with ease

Fa la la la la, la la la la (fa la la la la, la la la la)

This defense is improving quickly

Fa la la la la, la la la la (fa la la la la, la la la la)

But interceptions make us sickly

Fa la la la la, la la la la (fa la la la la, la la la la)

Fa la la la la, la la la la la la

Fa la la la la, fa la la la

Fa la la la la, la la la la la la

Fa la la la la, fa la la la

Dean and Davis are dominating

Fa la la la la, la la la la (fa la la la la, la la la la)

Barrett’s sacks are devastating

Fa la la la la, la la la la (fa la la la la, la la la la)

Mike and Chris, dynamic tandem

Fa la la la la, la la la la (fa la la la la, la la la la)

Make the playoffs for this fandom

Fa la la la la, la la la la (fa la la la la, la la la la)

Please Keep Our Best Guys

*To the tune of “Please Come Home For Christmas” by The Eagles*

Bucs will be playing their final game

Oh Twenty-Nineteen brought on some shame

No change this year, no playoff berth

Just the toughest team to cheer for on this earth

Fans will be screaming “Please, don’t leave Shaq,

Re-sign Godwin, bring JPP back.

Please keep our best guys

Please keep our best guys

And as for Jameis, the franchise tag.”

Jason and Brucey, they have to be choosey

Only so much they can spend

You need a QB in this league my dear

One that won’t give the ball to the other team

So won’t you tell me, you’ll get it fixed

So we don’t worry about all the picks

There will be no more sorrow, no grief and pain

And we’ll be happy, yes happy once again.

Shaq Barrett

Dashing through the line, with a five eight on his chest

Crushing quarterbacks, that’s what he does best

In the record books, tied with ol’ nine-nine

“One more game to break the mark and the record is all mine”

Oh!

Shaq Barrett, Shaq Barrett, you are just a beast

Oh what fun it is to see you tormenting Drew Brees

Oh!

Shaq Barrett, Shaq Barrett, you are tons of fun

Ever since you rocked him we have not seen Cam Newton

A sack or two have bloomed to a Pro Bowl season

The pass rush is now feared, and you are the reason.

Please Shaq come back next year, we really need your skill

Bruce said you would not go away, so hurry sign the deal

Oh!

Shaq Barrett, Shaq Barret, your play is oh so nice

Keep on haunting the dreams of the Falcons’ Matty Ice

Oh!

Shaq Barrett, Shaq Barrett, Tampa’s MVP

Jason Licht do not let this man walk away for free.

Hope you all have a wonderful holiday and - from the bottom of our hearts - thank you for making Bucs Nation such a special place to write for.