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DLT's Deadlocks - NFL Week One Picks

We're back for another fun-filled extravaganza of horrible picking proportion!

Larry French

Hey there Buccaroonies, can ya feel it in the air?

The brats on the grill, the smell of your favorite ice cold adult beverage as it caresses your lips. Yes friend, it's football season. The long layoff of boring baseball and basketball has finally given way to the greatest game the Creator has bestowed upon us.

So now, I get to once again demonstrate for you my severe lack of knowledge of football by delivering you my picks of the week.

Last season I guessed my way to 61% of correct picks and 30% on my upset specials.

Not bad if you're betting lines - but not too good if you're picking straight up - which I am.

So, with my mediocrity fully established. Here are my Week One selections!

Thursday Night, Sept. 5th

Broncos 30, Ravens 20 - The Nevermores can thank the Baltimore baseball club - I think they're called the Oreos or something like that, anyway that team forced this game to be on road for the Super Bowl Champs. Peyton on the road in the regular season is a tough nut to crack. Add that it's opening night? Not good.

Sunday, Sept. 8th

Patriots 27, Bills 16 - It doesn't matter who he's throwing to - it could be Giselle. The Patriots will still be potent.

Upset Special #1: Bengals 20, Bears 13 - Maybe I've been watching too much Hard Knocks but I really like this Bengals team. The Fozzies are going rue the day they let Lovie out of the cave.

Miami 23, Cleveland 13 - Yeah. I hate Miami's new uniforms, too. But they still look better than the Browns.

Detroit 26, Minnesota 16 - I think the Cowardly Ones may be the surprise team in the Norris. The Vikings? Not so much.

Indianapolis 27, Oakland 6 - I think Andrew Luck comes back down to Earth...but not this week.

Upset Special #2: Falcons 37, Saints 27 - The Falcons against THAT defense? Come on now, odds makers. Challenge me!

Buccaneers 20, Jets 10 - The Free-coaster is headed up this week. The Circus that is J-E-T-S? Good confidence builder for Tampa Bay.

Steelers 17, Titans 13 - I think the Titans will be better this season and the Steelers won't be a playoff team - but on opening day? In Roethlis...however the heck you spell the dude's name - we trust.

Seahawks 30, Panthers 20 - I think Russell Wilson comes back down to Earth...but not this week.

Chiefs 23, Jaguars 10 - Not sure what will be uglier. This game or the Shaguars half painted helmet.

Rams 27, Cardinals 20 - Scams begin their quest for .500 with a win at home. Carson Palmer shows why he couldn't play for the Raiders....THE RAIDERS, Cardinal fans.

49ers 30, Packers 24 - I think Colin Kaepernick comes back down to Earth...but not this week.

Sunday Night

Giants 23, Cowboys 14 - The Dallas hype machine is at it again but the hopes are quickly dashed by a home-styled serving of whupass by the G-men.

Monday Night

Redskins 30, Eagles 16 - I think RG III comes back down to Earth...but not this week.

Texans 31, Chargers 10 - Hey, maybe it wasn't Norv after all.