57% is a good number in political polls. It typically means you're going to win. We all love Heinz 57. Incident on 57th street was a great song by the Boss, Bruce Springsteen. Passenger 57 wasn't Wesley Snipes' worst movie (and that's saying a lot). If an offensive football team puts up 57 points on the board - they're a juggernaut.
What I'm saying is - typically 57 isn't that bad of a number. However, when you're picking games (and straight up - not even against the spread), 57% is pretty darned terrible. I almost expected the Chicago Bears to beat Jacksonville by 57 points just to throw my incorrect upset special in my face.
It's difficult to blame my cat Artemis or my dog LeStat - they were just working off my synergy. I have the 57% vibe working and one either embraces it in fun or laments it and let's it bring them down.
So with that it mind, I'm going to flaunt my 57% percent average by having every winner this week score 57 points.
But who will those winners be? Let's find out - at least 57% of them should be right.
Season: 44-33 57%, Upset Specials: 3-6 33%
Last Week: 8-6 57% Upset Special: 0 for 1
On the Couch: Panthers, Bears, Jaguars, Saints
Steelers 57, Titans 10 - The Steelers found a way to squeak out a win against the Iggles, but they shouldn't have any problems with the Flaming Thumbtacks (thanks BSPN). Do you remember when Chris Johnson was actually worth a darn?
Buccaneers 57, Chiefs 20 - So the Close But No Cigar Bucs host the train wreck that is the Kansas City Googly Mooglies. Brady Quinn will get his first start since 2009 - but we all know this game will come down to Tampa Bay's ability to stop the run. Either that or how many times Captain Fear can do Opa Gangnam Style before passing out.
Captain Fear & Tampa Bay Buccaneers Cheerleaders - Gangnam Style (via BucsLifeOfficial)
Colts 57, Jets 13 - This may be the game that brings us Tebow Time. Could Andrew Luck actually get the Dolts to 3-2?
Upset Special: Browns 57, Bengals 10 - It's time for Cleveland to get a win - what would be better than upsetting the hated Bungles who apparently can't even beat the bad teams anymore?
Eagles 57, Lions 27 - The Lions are a team wide version of Cam Newton. Yes, they were solid last season but this year they've come crashing back to earth. The Eagles aren't as good as 3-2 but they'll be good enough to get by the Cowardly Ones.
Falcons 57, Raiders 3 - This score may actually be close to reality. The Flukins have the look of a 14 win team - unfortunately they also have the look of a first round loser - just because it's the Flukins...they're the Braves of football - just not good enough to get to the big game. The Commitment to Excrement crew? Meh.
Rams 57, Dolphins 13 - A pair of teams who've surprised a few of the so called experts face off in Miami. The Scams have really developed on defense while the Fins on their home turf have proven to be a tough out this season.
Ravens 57, Cowboys 20 - the Cowpokes continue to disappoint while the Nevermores seem to be hitting their stride (despite a subpar sleeper in Kansas City).
Cardinals 57, Bills 3 - The Wagons circled and have been burned in Buffalo while the Cards were knocked from the ranks of the undefeated. I have resolved not to pick Buffalo for the rest of the season.
Upset Special #2 Seahawks 57, Patriots 30 - The Seahags are tough at home and the Patsies are coming all the way across the country to battle the neon green crew. Usually Russell Wilson vs. Tom Brady wouldn't end well for the home team - but weird stuff happens in that strange looking stadium.
49ers 57, Giants 34 - This may be the game of the week. The Gold Diggers seem to be the class of the NFC but the defending Super Bowl Champs beg to differ.
Vikings 57, Redskins 23 - RG III got his bell rung last week and is iffy to start against the surprising good Thors. Minnesota has just about shocked everyone with their start and may take another step in challenging for the NFC Norris division.
Texans 57, Packers 20 - The Redundants took a big loss on their defense, losing star Brian Cushing - but never fear Redundant fans - here comes Barrett Ruud - a tackling machine! Just don't expect any of those within 10 yards of the line of scrimmage.
Broncos 57, Chargers 20 - The Bronks look to right the ship on the road against their division rival San Diego Super CHARGERS! Peyton has made it through the first month of the season and Denver's struggles aren't on his performances but the surrounding cast. Still, I think they might surprise on Monday Night.