One of the most difficult tests I’ve ever taken was the SAT (Scholastic Aptitude Test). Back in the spring of 1992, my friend and I studied for months to take that test, only to be disappointed with our mediocre scores. Nowadays, everyone takes the ACT, but back then, colleges preferred the SAT to the ACT. Simply put, the SAT is more difficult. Divided into two sections, the test measures your verbal and mathematical aptitude. For some good math practice, read Buc Wild. I’m here to help with the verbal. One of the most difficult parts of the verbal section consists of defining very big words you’ve never seen before. Words like illation (the act of drawing conclusions) or quern ( a hand turned grain mill) combine to really lower your score. With that in mind, I thought I’d provide our student readers with a little vocabulary lesson, Buccaneers style. Learn to use really big words to describe the Buccaneers, Raheem Morris, or Josh Freeman after the jump.
Well, here are fifteen big words you can use in a sentence when talking about the Buccaneers (I have provided some sentence examples to help get you started).
1. Zydeco: noun. Popular music of southern Louisiana that combines elements of French and Caribbean music and the blues, played on the guitar, the accordion, and a washboard. Since leaving LSU, Michael Clayton has not heard any zydeco, or caught any passes.
2. Bubonocele: noun. A partial hernia of the groin, characterized by swelling in the groin area. Mark Dominic announced in his press conference that he suffered a bubonocele while lugging scouting reports around the draft room.
3. Kludge: noun. A system constituted of poorly matched elements or of elements originally intended for other applications. The Jim Bates experiment proved to be a total kludge from top to bottom.
4. Dactylogram: noun. A fingerprint. When Greg Olson took over as offensive coordinator, Jon Gruden‘s dactylograms were all over the playbook.
5. Enteron: noun. The alimentary canal, the intestines . Sometimes, watching this team play in 2009 made me sick to my enteron.
6. Gimcrack: noun. A cheap, useless, showy object. For the Buccaneer offense, Byron Leftwich became a real gimcrack after three games.
7. Huckaback: noun. A course absorbant cotton or linen fabric used esp. for toweling. After the spanking by the Jets, the trainers wiped blood off the field with huckabacks.
8. Jannisary: noun. A member of a group of elite, highly loyal supporters. After a year like this, true Buccaneer jannisary get their news from Buc ‘em.
9. Levant: verb. To leave hurriedly or in secret to avoid unpaid debts. Jagodsinski levanted ten days before the season started.
10a. Misogamy: noun. Hatred of marriage. At his noon press conference tomorrow, Tiger Woods will admit to misogamy.
10b. Misology: noun. Hatred of reason, argument of enlightenment. I feel bad for Oakland Raider fans due to their owner’s apparent misology.
11. Nugatory: adjective. Of little or no importance, trifling. I know it is an extremely important position, but I think that the assistant secondary coach has a nugatory job.
12. Optative: adjective. Expressing a wish or choice. The victory over the Seahawks made Ndamakung Suh optative thinking for Buccaneer fans.
13. Pavid: adjective. Exhibiting or experiencing fear, timid. Cab Drivers in the bay area get very pavid when picking up Aqib Talib.
14. Quion: noun. A cornerstone. Josh Freeman is the quion of the rebuilding effort and the quion for the reemergence of the gerry curl movement.
15. Repetend: noun. A repeated word or phrase. For Gene Deckerhoff, "three and out" has become a repetend this year.
So, there you have it, message boarders and blogophites, some ammunition to rake us over the coals, and sound like Harvard graduates while doing so. Oh yeah….you’re welcome!