I call on you for your assistance and love, mostly your assistance. My name is Kirby, HELLO! I am a buccaneers fan, HOORAY! I live in Seattle, WA, BOOOO!

I was at the store yesterday and noticed that the Seattle Seahawks are conveniently placed on Gatorade bottles. I thought to myself, hey I bet the Bucs gatorade bottles probably look real real real pretty. Not only that, I can only assume it tastes better, and is better for you.

With all of this said, is there anyone here who wants to be a best friend and help send me like a flat of them? My qualifications for a friend are as follows;

~Good listener

~Active on social media(we can totes be friends on fb and I'll follow you on twitter like a creep)

~Very good at texting

~Extremely optimistic, especially about your Tampa Bay Buccaneers

~I will be in Tampa for the throwback game and would buy you a beer(s) or beverage of your choice

~I also have money, in both my checkings and savings, yea what up

We could have nice long email chats or phone calls where we coordinate me paying for the gatorades and the shipping. Plus we could talk about other stuff like Josh Freeman's body hair, and Ronde Barber's teeth.

Who here wants to make a friend for life?