YOU PLAY TO WIN THE GAMES...HELLO! As the seconds ticked away in the 49ers-Rams game, Herm Edwards immortal words began to ring true. No one likes ties. Every time there's one in the NFL, people begin to talk about how to eliminate them for good but it happens so infrequently (the last one was in 2008) that the fervor eventually dies down and it's forgotten until the next sister kisser happens.
Also infrequent is back-to-back weeks where my picks make me look somewhat competent in this position. Sure, when you're striving to not look like a complete jackwagon every week (I know, FAIL) - it's the little things that you take pleasure in.
Not only did yours truly go 9-4-1 last week, but I also nailed my upset special. I'm on Fie-Yah.
With me in a good mood, I look for some hope for each team in the NFL during this week's pick segment.
Season: 79-66-1 54% Upset Specials: 6-11 35%
Last Week: 9-4-1 67% Upset Specials: 1 for 1
Bills 33, Dolphins 27 - For the Bills, they get on national tv this week and they play an opponent they can beat. Its not going to get much better than that - but hey, there's always March and April. The Dolphins got hot for a little while but then reality has set in. Still, no one expect them to win 4 games this season after watching their dysfunction on Hard Knocks so they're already ahead of the game.
Packers 37, Lions 20 - Oh, the Cowardly Ones are playing oh so cowardly this season. But hey, look at the bright side - if the Lions won the Super Bowl, the Mayans would be right and the world would end. The Meat Packers have been under achieving a bit this season but they're coming off the bye and its time for them to play football.
Falcons 27, Cardinals 20 - So the old dudes down in Miami are popping corks again, yet we all knew the Flukens were a weak 8-0 didn't we? Still, to be positive, we're still over a month away from Atlanta's latest playoff flame out. Arizona started hot, cooled off and now its about time for them to get hot again - right? They'll win enough games to save Ken Whisenhunt's job and cue up another year of mediocrity.
Buccaneers 28, Panthers 16 - The Bucs are a playoff contender - but they're also young. How will they handle this recent run of success? I think well. The Panthers have the off-season and next year to look forward to. Perhaps Ryan Kalil meant the Panthers would win the Super Bowl in 2017?
Cowboys 20, Browns 10 - Things are getting ugly in Big D, but it could be worse - they could be the Browns. Speaking of the team that time forgot, at least Trent Richardson is playing well. That's one draft pick they didn't blow. Brandon Weeden? Meh.
Redskins 27, Eagles 13 - The Redskins have been reeling a bit but the bye week came at the perfect time. As long as they haven't quit on Shanny like he's quit on them, there's a chance to string some wins together. The Eagles? Let's see...positive...positive...hmmm. You have a passionate fanbase. That's good, right?
Rams 30, Jets 13 - For the Rams, they're certainly a better team under Jeff Fisher than they were last season. Not sure Bradford is as good as advertised but Danny Amendola is the truth. The Jets? Well, in about a month we probably won't hear anymore Super Bowl predictions from Rex Ryan for a while.
Bengals 27, Chiefs 13 - Huzzah! The Chiefs led in a game against the Steelers! And then promptly lost in overtime. Regime change is coming in Kansas City, so that will be something to get excited about. Cincy has been playing a bit better of late and a win on the road gets them back to .500. In the AFC, that keeps you in the hunt.
Texans 40, Jaguars 6 - The Texans look like the class of the AFC this regular season. Which of course means they won't even sniff the Super Bowl - but we're trying to stay positive here. The Jaguars? At least the franchise hasn't moved to LA...yet.
Upset Special: Raiders 37, Saints 35 - For the Raiders, they catch the Saints in a hangover after their upset of Atlanta. For the Saints - At least this nightmare season is almost over, you'll get your head coach back and return to NFC South dominance....or not.
Patriots 30, Colts 17 - For the Pats, its the same old song - and that's good. It means you're in line for another division title and another shot at the ring. For the Colts - what a season these guys have had. No one expected Indy to win more than 4 games this season - and they're 6-3. It's good to have a little Luck.
Ravens 21, Steelers 13 - Not only am I terrible at picking games - I'm also bad at fantasy football. With my regular starter Aaron Rodgers on bye, I dropped Joe Flacco and picked up Cam Newton. Newton got me 17 pts. Flacco scored 42. What's that have to do with Baltimore? Well, Flacco's playing well and the Steelers are without Big Ben. For the Steelers, at least you'll get a few weeks of funny Re-Run and Gary Coleman internet memes of your starting QB. Speaking of Re-Run - what the heck happened to Shaun King? Saw him on the NBC Sports Network the other night and he looks like he ate Trent Dilfer.
49ers 14, Bears 6 - Another big game for the Chicago Bears but it looks like they're going to have to do it without Jay Cutler. Look on the bright side, Da Bears fans. At least Jay's crying towel will remain dry this week. The 49ers aren't quite as good as they were last season but everyone gets a look at the kid San Fran fans have been wanting to dump Alex Smith for.