The Onion Lays it out better than I could.

by putupyourDUKES on Jan 16, 2012 8:38 PM EST

TAMPA BAY, FL—The search for a new Buccaneers head coach has continued in Tampa Bay, where last week team management flew in Marty Schottenheimer, former NFL coach and current head of UFL's Virginia Destroyers, to discuss how utterly terrible he would be in the position. "We were fascinated by Marty's embarrassingly dated offensive philosophies, his inability to make defensive adjustments that optimize his on-field personnel, and his tendency to lose his cool in pressure-filled game situations," said Bucs co-chairman Joel Glazer, adding that Schottenheimer has proven he has what it takes to win in the NFL "unless it's an important game," and furthermore would have "absolutely no idea" what to do with promising young quarterback Josh Freeman. "Plus, he'd probably bring in his idiot son Brian to coach the offense, completing a totally dismal package." Sources close to the Buccaneers said the meeting "went very well" and Schottenheimer is now the leading candidate to take over the team

http://www.theonion.com/articles/bucs-to-talk-with-marty-schottenheimer-about-how-l,27031/

Fantastic.

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That's hilarious

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by Sander on Jan 16, 2012 9:08 PM EST reply actions

Woah, how is cheapo magee gonna bash a coach who last went 12-4?

by Titankillah on Jan 16, 2012 11:51 PM EST reply actions

www.ottotd.com for all your rayz needz
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by putupyourDUKES on Jan 17, 2012 12:33 AM EST up reply actions

atleast we're not losing every game

by Titankillah on Jan 17, 2012 1:25 AM EST up reply actions

Don't you think that would drive him even more?

If I were in his shoes. That would just eat at me. To have such a great record followed by the nick name "Choke"enhiemer and no ring. He knows all he needs is that ONE ring to shut it all up and retire peacefully.So I feel he has the BIGGEST chip on his shoulders to get rid off that bad memory. Not to mention he hasn’t been away from the game of football. Just not inside the NFL. But he just took a UFL team to and won a championship.

Worst thing he can do is make this team better. Kind of like Wyche/McCay(drafting) and Dungy(developeing) did before Gruden(pushed them over the top) got here. We are repeating history. Right now Raheem/Dom(drafting) has actually filled this team with young talent that needs to be formed and developed correctly to be winners, leaders, and most importantly MEN. This is the next step. It’s developing (Dungy) time. Marty is the proven Developer of winners.

We are at the right position to pick a guy exactly like Marty. Allow a master mind to get this team to the gates, and if he can’t go all the way. Allow the next (Gruden) guy to come in and push them over the edge.

by BucIt4U on Jan 17, 2012 1:30 AM EST up reply actions

Every game

is a big game in the NFL. There arent many games that dont matter unless you 4-12.

by gusjackson on Jan 17, 2012 12:38 PM EST up reply actions

14-2 was his last recrod.

by BUCSwillDOMINATE on Jan 17, 2012 11:20 AM EST up reply actions

The one big thing we DO know about Marty.

Is at least with out a doubt (over any other candidate out there) fully capable of taking this team to the playoffs year in and year out. Isn’t that at least better then not even having a shot?

by BucIt4U on Jan 17, 2012 1:33 AM EST reply actions

Pretty funny.

The only thing I like about the possibility of Schotty is his ability to quickly instill discipline in a team. Probably the biggest thing, outside of talent, this team needs.

Formerly UNFNole

by MNeilson on Jan 17, 2012 9:44 AM EST reply actions

"then"

Pretty funny, but this is probably more suitable as a fanshot

"Few things are harder to put up with than the annoyance of a good example." ~ Mark Twain

by LeeCaz on Jan 17, 2012 10:17 AM EST reply actions

look at all your readers defending a shott hire.

by putupyourDUKES on Jan 17, 2012 11:03 AM EST up reply actions

All three of them so far

Quit beating a dead horse. You’ve made it abundantly clear you’re not in favor of a Schott hire. Time to move on to something else. If he comes back in for an interview, by all means, let loose the fury.

"Few things are harder to put up with than the annoyance of a good example." ~ Mark Twain

by LeeCaz on Jan 17, 2012 11:50 AM EST up reply actions

Oh, you know I will.

by putupyourDUKES on Jan 17, 2012 11:56 AM EST up reply actions

So if

With Marty we make to the NFC championship game. Would you be on here saying you were wrong.

by gusjackson on Jan 17, 2012 12:39 PM EST up reply actions

You must be joking...

never heard him say he was wrong – about anything. Even when he is…

by Cracker Ball on Jan 17, 2012 12:57 PM EST up reply actions

I'd love him here

by aakks on Jan 17, 2012 12:29 PM EST up reply actions

same here

Tired of stupid ppl thinking 12-4 isn’t quite good enough for a loser of a franchise.. you can’t be bottom of the barrel and picky at the same time.

by Titankillah on Jan 17, 2012 1:57 PM EST up reply actions

*14-2

by Titankillah on Jan 17, 2012 1:58 PM EST up reply actions

Yep

I’ll worry about winning in the playoffs when we can actually make the playoffs.

by aakks on Jan 17, 2012 2:01 PM EST up reply actions

This is my response to that!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6EfRIK1laC4

by gusjackson on Jan 17, 2012 10:50 AM EST reply actions

And this!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RrWiVXZxmCk

by gusjackson on Jan 17, 2012 10:56 AM EST reply actions

Besides... The Onion? Really?

Let’s see what the National Enquirer and the Star have to say as well.

by Cracker Ball on Jan 17, 2012 12:58 PM EST reply actions

The Enquirer has actually broken some big stories

Although it is almost entirely fluff, they have gotten a few big breaks.

The onion is frequently hilarious and never tries to be serious. This is actually pretty funny I think, although Schott is still my top choice right now.

by aakks on Jan 17, 2012 1:13 PM EST up reply actions

Agreed, bring him in with some stud coordinators and a commitment to spend some cap

Let’s go Glazers, get this done. You spoon fed Tampa Bay BS for the last 3 years. On with it please.

by BUCSwillDOMINATE on Jan 17, 2012 4:51 PM EST up reply actions

That plan requires the Investor Group to spend money

lol u

F Slow
F Cason
F Draysbay
#FreeOTTOTD @ OTTOTD.com

by Warde on Jan 18, 2012 12:10 AM EST up reply actions

14-2 in his last year, 200 career wins

I really don’t think wed find more stability or experience elsewhere.. If this team made the playoffs next year and lost it would be an immense success.. Hire marty and let’s change the rep of our franchise

by Carlitin1988 on Jan 17, 2012 9:56 PM EST via Android app reply actions